Boobies

The conversation took a weird turn at dinner time. Violet Christie and I were having dinner with Ma, Violet's great-grandmother.

Out of the blue, Ma says, “Does your Momma have big boobies or little boobies?”

Violet looks at Christie and says, “Big Boobies.”

Being funny, Christie asked Violet, “Does Daddy have big boobies or little boobies?”

Violet looks at me and says, “Little boobies.” Well, I guess that's better than the alternative.

Christie asked Violet, “Does Ma have big boobies or little boobies?”

Violet looked at Ma and said, “Big boobies.”

Apparently Ma didn't like that answer so she said, “I think I have medium boobies.”

Christie and I realized that “medium” probably wasn't yet in Violet's vocabulary. We explained that “medium” was in between big and little. She seemed to get it so we asked her again. “Violet, does Ma have big boobies, little boobies, or medium boobies?”

“Medium boobies,” she said.

Ma decided to play with Violet a bit. She said, “Well you don't have any boobies at all.”

Without any hesitation, Violet said, “But I'm growing.”

We all laughed. We weren't sure that we had heard her right. She repeated, “But I'm still growing, right?”

Yes Violet. You're still growing. And so are your boobies.

Break

Violet was "helping" her great-grandmother shell peas. She was being a good helper, but quickly after finishing all the peas she went and sat down. "I need a break," she said.

Hammer

I bought Violet a little stick helicopter, the kind that you spin in your hand and it flies a few feet before hitting the ground. I spun it and Violet watched. She ran to get it where it landed.
"Bring it back, Violet."
"No, I'm gonna do it," she said.
"But you don't know how. Bring it here and I'll show you."
"No, I show you," she said and ran off with it.
When I caught up to her, she was banging it into trees. "I'm fixing this tree." After a few more taps, she declared the tree fixed and moved on to the next one. A few taps to that tree she said, "It's perfect."
She fixed a couple more trees, fixed the deck and then came over to me with her "hammer." "I'm gonna fix you," she said. She gave me a few taps of the hammer and told me that I was "all better."
I think it's great when a toy gets used in a totally unusual way, but it's still a hit.

At the Beach

We were having fun at the beach, Momma, Violet and I.  There were some older kids in the water shrieking.  So naturally, Violet started shrieking back at them, happy to have an excuse to make noise.  After a while we figured that she was starting to bother the family next to us.  We asked, "Hey Violet, how about you be quiet for a little while?"
Violet said, "But I don't want to be quiet, I just want to be yelling," finishing with a yell.

After a trip into the water, which made Violet very cold, and a while digging in the sand it was time to go.  We told her, "Violet, it's time to go."


She said, "But I want to make some more new friends."  So sweet.

On the way out, I starting making silly noises.  Momma said, "Daddy's crazy, isn't he?"
"Yes he is," Violet said somberly, completely unsurprised.

Doolin

We were driving up to Maine to see Christie's grandmother, Ma.  Violet was good in the car, but by three and a half or so hours, she was beginning to get punchy.  After a rest stop, I ended up sitting next to her to keep her entertained and to feed her some snacks.

My seat, behind the driver, is typically occupied by our dog, Doolin, when we take drives, though Doolin wasn't with us on this trip.

A little while after I occupied that seat, Violet looked at me in the car and said, "Are you OK, Doolin?"

I didn't understand what she meant.

She cleared it up, though, and it became clear that she was joking.  "You're not Doolin, you're daddy," she said.  Not the best joke ever, but at 2 years old I get her a lot of credit.

Not Quite

Christie was on the phone with her grandmother.  On speakerphone she asked Violet, "Are you excited to go up to Ma's house in Maine this weekend?"
Violet answered, "Um....not quite."
Sometimes her word choice kills me.

Dangerous!

Violet disappears for a minute.  It was breakfast time, so Momma told Violet to go in the kitchen and get in her highchair so they could eat.  When Momma got to the kitchen, she found Violet on her highchair.  Not really "in" the highchair, but "on" it.  The tray was still fastened and Violet was sitting precariously on top of the tray.
Momma said," What are you doing up there?"
Violet answered with a sly smile, "Is it dangerous?"  No fear sometimes.

Puzzle Patience

We started making a puzzle on vacation.  Having 1000 little pieces on a low coffee table, just Violet's height may not have been our best idea.  But actually, Violet was really well behaved around it.  I think someone told her to be gentle with it before I started helping, but just the same I was surprised when Violet said to me,  "There's a lot of little pieces so you have to be patient."  I love getting advice on patience from my 2 year old.

Chasin' Time

It was late and time for bed.  Unfortunately, Violet and Pepere had been running around the yard, so she was seriously wound up.
We went outside where Violet was playing. I said to her, "Violet, it's time for bed."
She said to Christie, "No, Momma, it's Chasin' time!"  Naturally she ran away from us as soon as she said it.  

At the beach

We went to the beach today and Violet had a blast. She had collected a nice handful of rocks. She went to the edge of the water and held her hand out and said, "Come get it." She said this a couple times before she gingerly dropped the rocks in the ocean.

On the way back from a walk, Auntie Nicole said, "Hey Violet, look at
the boys over here."
Violet walked over to them and in a voice several years too old for
her said, "Hi, boys!". Love the two year old confidence.

Listener

We were packing for Vacation and it was going to be a big job.  A lot of the house was coming with us on vacation.  I knelt down and explained to Violet that we needed her to help and to be a good listener while we worked.  Violet didn't indicate that she understood, but she was well behaved.  Shortly after she came over to me and said, "I'm not being a not good listener."  Totally true.

Leafs

While on vacation, we took a hike to a beach that's a nature preserve, not a frisbee and beach umbrella place.  It was actually a fun change, seeing a more natural place with less people.

I carried Violet in her baby backpack, so she got a pleasant ride on the hikes to and from the car.  One the hike back she said, "Good job leafs."
I didn't get it, so I asked, "What're they doing a good job with?"
I guess these were brushing past her, but not harshly.  She answered, "They"re being very gentle."

Steering the boat

We took a harbor sail while on vacation.  I think Violet enjoyed it, but she had to wear this ridiculously large life jacket the whole time, which she was a really good sport about.
At one point the Captain let Violet hold the wheel and steer the boat.
Christie asked, "Are you steering the ship?"
Violet replied, "Hi, my name is Captain Violet."

Eavesdropping

We were out at dinner today, Violet, Momma, Uncle Jerry and I.
Somewhere in the middle of lunch, Violet says, "Did that woman take
her house?"
We had no idea what she was talking about. The comment had nothing to do with what we were talking about.
Uncle Jerry explained. Apparently Violet had been listening in to the table next to us. Jerry told us that one woman had said, "She wants me to be her friend. I can't be her friend. She took my house." We
tried to discreetly tell Violet not to eavesdrop on the other table.  Much later in the afternoon Violet went up to Mommy and said, "Rahr!" like a cat. Then Violet said in her scary voice, "Rahr, I take your house."
Super. Now I don't have to watch my own mouth, but everyone nearby as well.

Pick One

Violet had lain three books down on her bed, a Thomas book, a book about Spot the puppy and a book about Elmo and his blanket.  She arranged them in a new row, next to each other.
She said to me, "Pick one."
I picked the Thomas one.
She said, "No.  Pick one."
I laughed in surprise that I could have picked the wrong one.  I picked the Spot book.
She said, "No," and pointed to the Elmo book.  "Can you pick this one?" she said.
I said, "Sure," and laughed again.  It kills me when she does an adult thing, but doesn't really understand the rules.

Cut You!

Violet and Auntie Coles were watching Chip and Dale cartoons today.  Violet enjoys them but gets tired of them pretty quickly.  So she didn't surprise Auntie Coles when she got up from the couch and went over to her toys.
What did surprise Auntie Coles was when Violet brought her Clifford the Big Red Dog stuffed animal over, along with a play knife from her play kitchen.  She started cutting Clifford with the plastic knife.  Auntie Coles said, "Violet, what are you doing?"
"I cutting Clifford," Violet said, like it was a perfectly reasonable thing to do.  Then, Violet went for Clifford's ear and said, "I cut his ear off."  When I heard this story I thought, did someone let Violet watch Reservoir Dogs?
Then Violet came over to Auntie Coles and made a crazy face.  She said, "I'm gonna cut you, Raar."  And then she went on to playing with other toys, like that was a perfectly reasonable thing to say to the babysitter.
I didn't know what to say to Auntie Coles when I heard this story.  Kindof blew me away!

Crying

"It's crying," Violet said to us out of the blue. "What is?" we asked. "The baby in my belly. It's crying." "Um, OK." We thought, thinking what made her put that together.

Fancy Dinner

We went out to a nice dinner, which seemed like it was a casual place from the outside.  When we got inside, it was all quiet, candle-lit, and dressed up people.  I was ill at ease, but the host and the waitress were very friendly and didn't give us a bit of stink-eye from bringing a two year old at all.
We were on red alert, trying to make sure Violet didn't do anything too crazy or loud.  She actually was extraordinarily well behaved throughout.  She ate moderately well, didn't drop anything on the floor--as far as I saw, anyway-- and generally kept her antics to our table.
She caught me with a really random bit of imagination, though.  She looked me right in the face and said, "You're a candle," and blew in my face to "blow me out."  Hilarious.
After dinner, as we were walking out, Violet said aloud to the quiet restaurant, "Goodbye everybody."  Maybe it's parental bias, but I thought that was super cute.  It stung a bit that absolutely no one waved or said "bye" back.  I don't want my kiddo's sweetness stomped out of her by a bunch of stodgy old folks, so I was very loud in my praise.  "Good job!" I boomed, "That was soo nice of you to say good bye to everyone."  I meant it.  It was nice.
The cuteness has left the building, you can all return to your previously schedule boring dinners.

Tired?

I had pulled a bonehead move in the middle of the night.  Violet was sleeping in her pack and play in Christie's and my bedroom that night of vacation.  I had been half-asleep and was getting overheated.  I had tried to swing my leg out from under the covers and put it on top of the covers, in an attempt to help cool me off.  It's a pretty standard maneuver at home anyway, and actually works.  That time, though, I swung my leg into the side of the pack and play, kicking it pretty hard.  Violet woke with a start and began to scream.  It took several minutes of Mommy hugs to calm her down, and settle her back into sleep.  Admittedly not my brightest move ever, but I wasn't really awake.

Later on, Violet yawned at lunch.  "Are you tired?" Momma asked.
Violet said, "Yeah, because someone crashed my crib today!"  Total accusation.

Crazy Hair

Out of nowhere Violet declares, "I have crazy hair."

Gramma's Boy

Out of nowhere in the middle of dinner, Violet said, "Dover is Gramma Kelley's boy."
It was so random, that it took me a while to realize what she had said.  I said, "Dover, yeah, he's Gramma Kelley's dog."
Violet made the face that I'm starting to think of as the "Don't you get it, Daddy?" face.  She said, "But he's a boy."
"Yes he's a boy," I agreed with her.
"And Bailey is a girl," Violet said, talking about Gramma Kelley's other dog.
"Yes," I just agreed, clearly I'm not equipped to argue semantics with my two year old.

BYE

Violet was getting punchy in her high chair at the end of dinner when Mommy called on the phone from work to say goodnight.  We talked with Momma for a bit and then Violet started these screams of "BYE."
"BYE," she yelled.
"OK, Violet, I hope you have a good bath," Momma said.
"BYE", another yell.
"I hope you have good sleep."
"BYE."
"I love you"
"BYE"
"Will you say 'I love you'?"
"I saying bye!"

The Castle?

Violet and I were having dinner, while Christie was at work.  In the middle of eating, Violet said, "Daddy, ask what I do."
It took me a minute to realize that she wanted me what she did that day, as I normally ask her at dinner.
"OK, Violet, I haven't asked you yet, have I?  What did you do today?"
Violet put on her sly smile and said, "I do knocking down the castle."
No idea what she was talking about.  "The castle?  What is that?"
"It was a accident," she said.
A castle?  In Violet's imagination that could be anything.  I made a mental note to look around for new broken things and hoped that "the castle" was made of legos.

The Remote

Christie had put the TV on for Violet, while they were having breakfast.  Christie was holding the remote in her hand.  Violet was excited to watch her Sesame Street, so she didn't want Christie to change the channel.
She said, "Can you please put that down?"  
It just didn't seem very two-year-old to me to not be able enjoying her TV show until she's certain the channel isn't going to change.

Status

Christie left Violet alone to go use the bathroom.  After a few minutes Violet decided she needed to investigate she came and banged on the door.  She said, "Momma what are you doing?"